you know,i was looking forward to the whole diet challenge thingy.i mean not to lose weight of course since i know diets dont help but just for fun.besides i'm kinda competitive afterall.so yeah,i was truly sad when mabel dropped out.like there wasnt any real challenge alre.and yeah,i can understand she dropped out cuz her friend told her to do so so i wont faint or something.i know i should be feeling happy that ppl are concerned over my health but somehow,i feel more disappointed in the fact that no one believes me and are not even giving me a chance to prove myself.yes,i clearly know mabel's a pro at dieting but everyone makes it seem as thought i cant even last like a quarter of what she can do.i mean if we're back in kranji,no one would doubt that.they know i can hold my hunger perfectly well.i still remember how ms.angie yeo had to force me to eat or else she'll stop me from training.guess they dont really know me that well yet.oh wells,i'll just prove myself sometime in the future then.

WOW.really cant remember the last time since i blogged.
so yeah caught blood pledge today.
you know,i was so desperate to watch a horror film in the cinema,i even decided to watch it alone.haha!
decided to watch it at grandcathay/cine but somehow while boarding the train,i decided to go causeway instead.
GOOD CHOICE.
cuz i bumped into the twins there.
i was like shocked and of course,pleasantly surprised.
and found out they were gonna watch blood pledge too!
so i didnt end up watching the movie alone (:
the movie was fine.
kinda startling at times.
but somehow,i got shocked most of the times cuz of meixuan screaming next to me rather than what was going on in the movie itself.haha!
went arcade afterwards and those two wanted to play the sweets machine.
wasted 3 bucks and all we got was one pathetic sweet?!
ps;i skipped sch today cuz i kinda got up at 1?haha!

what do you do when you start to think differently of a teammate?

being in kranji,i was surrounded by ppl who were constantly fighting to get into the school team;fighting to get a chance to play on court and prove yourself.even more specifically,i looked at jocelyn and could clearly see the drive and desire to make it to school team.and even for myself,no matter how close i am with meixuan,we both understood that we are gonna fight for the same position and we are friendly to each other etc but yet,we fight all out when it comes to making it to the main team.

so now in jj when i hear one player saying that not making it into the school team is not a big deal,of course i'll get super shocked.shock is only one part of it.there're many other emotions i felt too when i knew of it.but hard to put it down here.just pick out the few strong emotions.lol.so i definitely felt disappointed too.like 'i have such a teammate?'am i too sensitive for taking the person's words too seriously?

i dont want to think in such a way towards a teammate ):
yaoshuyi,how?!

i really cant get over it.
i know it's just a bottle but yet,it's a team bottle.
i really treasure the team so that's why i really loved the bottle.
the moment i knew that there wasnt anymore bottles at queensway,i totally felt dejected lah.
plus when i was in the cab to meet jocelyn and yongkian,i started thinking of the bottle and i started to cry.
i know it's such a shocking thing right.
nadia will cry over such small stuffs meh.
but i will if something really matters to me.
so that's how important the bottle is to me.
it's like without the bottle,i dont feel part of REDBOTTLES.
lyndi knocked some sense into me and even said without the redbottle,i'm still part of them but yet,i still have the uneasy feeling.
i mean what about the next game we have together?
when everyone has their redbottle,i'll have nothing and i'll feel damn miserable and out of place.
i totally feel depressed.
i cant think of the bottle without breaking down.
even right now as i'm blogging this,i'm alre crying ):
sigh,i'll nvr forgive myself for being so careless ):

i really really wanna thank jocelyn and yongkian for the mini advanced birthday celebration at iluma yesterday (:
i totally didnt expect it.
so a million thanks to you guys!

something funny happened too.
jocelyn had to leave earlier so me and yk went to J.CO since i wanted to eat the yoghurt there.
unfortunately,there wasnt any yoghurt so we just got drinks instead.
then we happened to see my mum's bff and i found out my mum would be coming there too.
so signalled to yk and he understood and we left hurriedly.
yk said he needed to go to the toilet and afterwards while walking out,both of us bumped into my mum.
so yk was like beside me at that point of time.
luckily he can recognise my mum(he bumped into her with me more than once alre lah.a surprise my mum couldnt recognise him.haha!)
so being such a genius,he totally acted as though he didnt know me and walked right past me and my mum.
HAHA!i totally think it was a brilliant move lah!!
so we managed to escape.LOL!
i know you guys wont get it why we have to act that way but of course there're some reasons that prolly only jocelyn and yk knows i guess.

overall,i really enjoyed today despite not going to the zoo as planned.hahas!
nvm jocelyn,can always go some other time (:

wth,do you think you're superwoman?!
list of commitments:
netball
basketball
sports day competitions
council(or line camp specifically)
studies
kranji alumni
friendships

netball
A div is really close.
like a month's time or less.
plus we havent really learnt each other's styles etc.
it's worrying.
i dont think we're there yet.
that's why we really have to like give our best during trainings and really try to bond more with the other players.
and netball's twice a week.
but one day clashes with council meetings.
plus we might have a day for friendlies too.

basketball
i might be helping out with the team for their A div cuz they need a center apparently.
not enough tall players.
there is a high chance i'll play but i insisted that i go for their trainings first and see how it goes.
dont really wanna embarass myself lah.
trainings are twice a week but one clashes with netball so i'll just go for one day of basketball training.

sports day
i took part in javelin/discus/shot putt and tug of war.
i dunno what're the results but the one that has been really eating up into alot of my free time is the tug of war trainings.
it always starts very late and can last quite long.
but i know it's really very crucial to get all of us to bond and get the rhythm etc.
so i really think the trainings are useful if we want to get 1st since the J2s are alre out.

council
council meetings are like every weds and sat.
plus the line camp is super near so we have to rush thru like dman lots of stuffs.
so almost all of my free time are like allocated to doing line camp prep.
dancing/cheering/going thru games etc.
sounds fun but it's really exhausting.
neverhteless,still looking forward to camp (:

studies
jc studies are really very difficult.
the notes itself are super thick!
plus i'm alre lagging behind for certain subjects.
ESPECIALLY MATHS!!!!
YONGKIAN PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ): ): ): ): ):
i cant use the GC for nuts lah.
plus it doesnt help i'm the lowest scorer for maths for Olevel ):
and it's like there's not one subject where i can confidently say i'll do well at it.
sucks lah plus i havent finish reading all my lecture notes. ):

kranji alumni
i mean this commitment is really asking for that much currently.
but i'm sure all the activities will start kicking in very soon.
just hope by then my schedule has cleared up a lil so can cope better.

friendships
i really havent been meeting up with my old friends.
like be it seniors/same age/juniors etc,i just feel that i've been neglecting you guys alot.
maybe except for jocelyn and the twins,i really feel guilty to the rest of my other close friends for like not catching up etc.
but my life is really darn hectic for now ):

so basically what i'm trying to say is like i think i got too involved with the stuffs going on at school AGAIN.
i really cant break free from this.
it's like i just love participating so i'll like just join alot of things.
my week somehow goes like this now:
monday: netball
tuesday: finish up line camp stuffs
wednesday: council meeting
thursday: line camp prep again
friday:basketball
saturday:netball friendly
sunday:rest/homework/personal time etc
super packed right?!
sigh,but it's really my own fault.
i want everything so i really gotta start learning how to manage my time better.

you can do it! :D

psst,SALAD PROPOSED TO ME TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hahas!if you're wondering who she is,she's a netball senior who is like WAY WAY thick-skinned than anyone else you know and super CRAZY too!

please cheer up okay.
it really hurts me to see you sad.